NOT a food blog
One of the perks of food blogging is meeting new people, some of whom end up assuming different roles in my life. They come in all shapes and sizes, as is evident in my latest friend, Frat. Frat Mustard.
Frat just dropped in for a quick chat.
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“Hello everyone!”
“Hiya Frat. You’re a shy ‘un, aren’t ya? I thought only food bloggers hated being in the limelight. Why don’t you get out and let us see your face.”
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“Oh, alright. I’ll just climb out of this glass now.”
“Nice biceps.”
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“Let’s cut to the chase, lady.”
“We’re obviously cutting other parts too, eh, Frat? Sure you got your body parts intact?”
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“I came close to losing li’l Frat once. Boo_licious tried eating me, but I made a quick escape when the jug of beer got her attention instead.”
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“Problem is, it got mine too, so I plunged right in.”
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“And then, Fatboybakes lured me with fries. Let me rephrase that. Fatboybakes lured me with A fry.”
*growl*
“That wasn’t my stomach.” *eyes shifting*
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“You can’t possibly be hungry. You just ate a plate of pasta 5 times your weight.”
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“That’s why I’m Fat.”
“You mean Frat.”
“Yeah, that’s what I said. Lisa dahlink, light me a ciggie, babydoll?”
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“You know smoking’s bad for ya.”
“I do…I think about it all the time and just want to drown myself in some Bloody Mary.”
“It’s a virgin. A Virgin Mary.”
“Not once Frat gets into Mary.”
“Right. Moving on…so what does Frat do when he’s not devirginising mocktails?”
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“Yoga. It’s great for unkinking the muscles and spine. Especially if you’re really kinky.”
“Ummm okay.”
“Did you just fart? Something in the air smells spicy.”
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“Oh, that’d be my girlfriends, HP, Heinz and Tabasco. Hello Spicy, Mustard’s here!”
*stuffing nostrils with tissue*
“What else do you do…other than yoga, I mean?”
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“I bungee jump.”
“Into food.”
“Yeah, better to dive into a shitload of food than a load of shit.”
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“Ever got stuck in a tight spot before?”
“Are we talking about Virgin Mary again?”
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“Ummmm…I think that’s all the time we have for you right now.”
“Don’t be a stranger! When you’re in a pickle, think of Frat!”
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For more about Frat Mustard, check out his website HERE. Frat Mustard is also the face for TheQguides, an online restaurant booking site. I’ve signed up. Have you?
Food, for me, is a means to an end and not an end in itself.
Food, for me, represents the love of family, the fellowship of friends, and the community and communality it brings.
Lisa
July 23rd, 2009 at 12:24 pm
OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!! This is really funny la. And Frat thot you were too hung over to wake up this morning. Wonder who got ‘hung’ over now……:p
lotsofcravings
July 23rd, 2009 at 12:26 pm
wow..hes awesome isnt he?
Sugar & Spice
July 23rd, 2009 at 12:26 pm
Lolz – I loved the Virgin Mary part 😉 and now i’m tempted to get my mini figurine tooo :p
thule aka leo
July 23rd, 2009 at 12:30 pm
Hahahha… my 2nd time smiling today after my first one seeing my daughter smiling at me 🙂
your newly acquired pet boy??? Lol…
spunkz
July 23rd, 2009 at 12:54 pm
LOL. this really blew my PMS blues away. you’re really a great writer. AND photographer. 🙂
Lianne
July 23rd, 2009 at 1:13 pm
Hahaha .. funny post. I did not expect a figurine to appear until I scroll further! Made my day. Thanks 🙂
unkaleong
July 23rd, 2009 at 1:28 pm
I’ll be sure to offer Fart *oops* I meant Frat more than a single french fry when I meet him 😛
fatboybakes
July 23rd, 2009 at 1:36 pm
thamby, you misquoted the conversation on the virgin. howww many times oridi i toll you that drinking a virgin drink is not going to make you one!
babe_kl
July 23rd, 2009 at 1:51 pm
Frat is such a cutie and popular amongst the ladies, he’s sooo darn lucky!!!
Lyrical Lemongrass
July 23rd, 2009 at 3:36 pm
Lisa: Drunk on what? Virgin Mary ar? hahaha. We had fun last night. Thanks for organising it!
lotsofcravings: He’s certainly a cute little bugger.
Sugar&Spice: Not cheap, though. Costs almost 200 bucks! Eek, I dumped a 180 buck object into beer and spaghetti sauce? I hope the owner isn’t reading this.
thule aka leo: Awwww…you put me in the same innocent category as your li’l daughter. Awwwwwwwww.
spunkz: Some of the photos are shaky due to the influence of alcohol. hehe. Kewl…I’m a PMS blues shaker! (quickly scribbling on my resume)
Lianne: Well, it’s hard to feature people coz they’re all so camera shy anyway. hehe.
unkaleong: Please do. He loves to eat.
fatboybakes: Who was trying to become a virgin?
babe_kl: Yeah, Frat was fondled by many sweet young things. Such a lucky bugger.
cumidanciki
July 23rd, 2009 at 4:04 pm
LOL.. did the real frat suspect u nose-dived him into a load of stuff when he left the table! nortie LL and boo;P hehe
v farnee post .. love the animated frat.. you daredevil u!
Frat Mustard
July 23rd, 2009 at 4:24 pm
*sniff* *sniff* so touched… and by that I mean… I was touched “everywhere” last night… muahahahhaah… I like…
I feel six feet tall today… wheeeeeeeeee
An accurate summary of yesterday evening… except the ciggie came after… *errhemmm* wink…
Thanks everyone for making me so loved.
thenomadGourmand
July 23rd, 2009 at 4:45 pm
my my..Loved the post LL! So witty..so original..so fun to read!
Lyrical Lemongrass
July 23rd, 2009 at 4:52 pm
cumidanciki: no, he never suspected a thing. But I hear that women have done worse with him…like stuff him down their bras…
Frat Mustard: The man himself!! Of course Frat’s loved. We’d all like one in our likeness too, please. TQ.
thenomadGourmand: Hahaha…it’s called Intermission.
rokh
July 23rd, 2009 at 9:28 pm
i see this coming!! but it so much better when you put it that way! 🙂
A Lil Fat Monkey
July 23rd, 2009 at 11:13 pm
i want a friend like frat too! You think my dunnys would love to hang out with him?
Manggy
July 24th, 2009 at 1:51 am
Oh dear, that toy has certainly gone places 😛
superwilson
July 24th, 2009 at 10:10 am
Frat is getting too popular de… must get him a gf or something…
Lyrical Lemongrass
July 24th, 2009 at 12:10 pm
rokh: ya lor…frat just attracts so much attention!
Munkeyboy: Frat’s a Playa. You sure you wanna let your Dunnys near him?
Manggy: Oh, it certainly has – down women’s blouses and all…eughhh.
superwilson: Frat settle down?? No way! hehe.
Alexandra
July 27th, 2009 at 9:17 am
lol hilarious 🙂 btw just wanted to let you know that I nominated you for the kreativblogger award as I love reading your blog!
keropokman
July 28th, 2009 at 3:08 pm
u tried to cut him up?
you murderer…..